30 April 2006
Just 2weeks that we've been working together and our friendship is getting a stronger bond. Hais, school gonna starts soon wonder when will we be free to meet out for shopping, to slack around late in the night. Hais, so much of missing. I really felt so unbearable to be apart. Shutdown really cause me lots of depression s I really hate to be awake late in the night pening down my thoughts like what I'm doing now. Hais. I'm broke and I need to take out my courage to discuss something with my mom's. Aniwae, I really hope that she'll be feeling well later.
Hais, m damn sians. Mani things came across my mind but I shall not pen it down here since it's not too pleasant though is just a prediction. Currently, my emotion is taking over me. Is real darn sucks. I've a urge of not wanting to continue my studies animore. Please don't ask me why, s I do not even know why. Just one month of vacation, I realised that I've changed so much. Oh dear, what's happening to me? `m really depressed n afraid that I couldn't hang on ani longer. Where's my pillar?
I really do not know what's wrong in me. Who `m I to comment her so much? At times, I can say that she's basically friendly, chatty blah*3 of good points, but at times, m gonna say her that she's such a flirt and such a bitchy? WTH ~ Alright, I just wanna say that she's actually a nice girl w lots of good points other than flirting and behaving in such a bitchy and horny look. That's all. N we're still hi-bye friend. =) Here friendster's nicely designed, m havin a feelin like I just went to xiao mable gong zhu de palace, everything so sweet, so cute. Alright...
I wanna happiness by A-mei is super darn nice.
Aniwae, m getting my hair cut and adidas jacket only this weekend. And I've totally forgotten that I shouldn't touch those money that I've set aside for my semester fees and whateva hell shitty things for school. So now m so darn vexed over the sum of money that I've got to use for this Wednesday. Shit...
`Updated_
I feel so useless, dad's borrowing money from mom again. I went wth... each time you ask you ask for hundred plus and each time you promise to return, but u failed to. No work really cause me depression, schooling's just adding burden to me, I really feel like committing suicide. I always claim that we're one family and we shall help one another in everything. Yet I get so pissed off when it comes to money issue. Especially when everyone in the household are asking money from mom's except sis. (obviously `m included. o well, I've got to clarify. mom always feel so bad for not giving me allowances etc... but I've told her that i've grown up, i work and i'd afford everything myself. i wanna be independent. even one day that i realli left with no money for things that i need, then that would be a kind of punishment for me to spend money like water. but she still insist that i should take her money n save it up, but instead, i spent it away. i really hate myself for acting so implusively.)
Anyway, my beloved junior, Mu He gotten into NAFA. After so much of hard work that he putted in, finally he achieved something. `m proud of him.
I hope I'll luv myself more
04:27
29 April 2006
A night off for all contractors. I watched a video clip at Jo's site and now I realised that I miss playing cello but I couldn't play as good as before any more. Skills has become stagnant.
School gonna starts on the 2 May, I don't feel any excitement at all except miss meeting up my school girls catching up with one another. Rather sad, perhaps... I just enjoy working with friends over schooling. At least, I could have my own income and spend a lil' on things that I like.
Most probably, m going out with Kel on Monday. I've got no idea where she wanna go but m going to bugis to get my jean, and orchard to get my adidas jacket. Getting other things else when we're shopping and if it's still early when we reach Jurong, I think I should go and 've my hair trimmed.
`Update_
Alright, m back home with mom and sis. Mom was unwell, so she came back half way from work and we brought her to chinese physician. I bought a necklace fer my lil' niece s an advance birthday present, and bought a braclet for myself, that's gone my 166bucks. N also I bought her a puzzle, and learning VCD for her and A-mei I want Happiness CD that's gone my 20bucks. Ooo... I spent pretty lots this afternoon. Alright... 3nights of shutdown, hell.
I hope I'll luv myself more
03:55
28 April 2006
Yesterday was Mr Ji's birthday m down here wishing him Happy Belated Birthday. Alright, so is Friday morning, 3 more nights m gonna work. Thinking Monday should be going out to 've a good shop before school starts the next morning. =) I wanted to get my hair at least trimmed before school starts s well s tidying up all my things bah. Hais... m tired.
S each day pass by, we're closer and closer, m gonna miss you girls mucnchies, especially the kiss goodbye, smuackiex~
Thinkin n missin..
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:34
27 April 2006
Finally I've gotten all the rubbish things uninstalled from my computer =) Hmm, alright... Arnold jio me go Mos tonight to celebrate his birthday, but so sickening that m working. So m here wishing him, Happy Birthday! Dance till dawn yah?
Not only morning that I'll overslept but evening too. And it was so sickening of second brother for scolding my mom when she tries waking me up at 5pm till she so afraid to wake me up again. And last evening she only manage to wake me up from the bed at 7.10pm... and yes.. I took cabby there. Work was pretty relaxing but m feel even tiring.
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:38
26 April 2006
I think lately I've been getting older and older s m damn forgetful. Last evening I only discovered that my shirt has dropped somewhere when I almost reached the bus stop. So I went back to search for it, and yes... it dropped from my arms. And this morning I just realised that my freshbox jacket is left in the locker. M glad that she's still around to help me keep. =)
School gonna starts in no time, so m thinking of going out on labourer day? That's the only day that I think I could afford to sacrifice my working day. Kel, if you happens to visit here, just wanna let you know if you couldn't make it on Friday, we can still make it on the labourer day okies? And m thinking of meeting up my school girls on that day too. What you [YY] suggest?
I think m getting what I want, my adidas jacket, maybe the polo tee too. N my Da Chang Jin VCD s well s my Ah Mei's Wo Yao Kuai Le CD. It was agreed that May and I'll share the money to buy the VCD and sell it away to friend after watching at a cheaper price. S for the CD, m getting it ripped into the computer and to the MP3, I'll sell it at 3/4 price to Baby Jas, muacks ~
I hope I'll luv myself more
10:39
25 April 2006
`Sorries+_
After reading her blog, I'm down here to blog once more. I know I'm in fault for breaking my promise but I really do not know that at the last minute she's not going too. If I know, I'd not 've went to my sis house no matter how sad I'm over working stuffs. We've been 8yrs friends, I do not know whether 've I changed to a better temper girl or m I changing from bad to worse. Or, you're the one who has changed? Alright, m not denying that characteristic of one's gonna remain the same forever. What I'm trying to say over here is, I just feel so left out when the 3 of us are going out together s we're no longer in the same school, not even the same course. There isn't much topics we could just bring up to talk about, unlike those times we're in primary school.
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:48
've got nothing much to blog nowadays, or perhaps... m just lacking of sleep. 3hours of sleep is what I've got for Saturday afternoon, 3.5hours for Sunday afternoon and 4hours for yesterday afternoon. So there's this pattern that I saw, m gonna doze off only at 1.30pm? Think so.
Since they joined us, we're having a habit of not having dinner at home any more. N we would just order mac, rice or noodle to eat. So m saying m getting fatter! Time to slim down. O... did I mention that I ate nasi lemak after the 2nd day of the piercing and fishball noodle last afternoon? Haha... m still trying to eat fast lol. S friends could finish a mac set faster than me eating 1 apple pie. Humphf!
Mom's having a off day! =)
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:33
23 April 2006
M being weirdo recently that I really do not know what I really wanted. I get pressurized everywhere in everything that I do, but why m I so? I do not know whether m I wrong to say that this world is unfair? So many things that I've done, there wasn't any compliment, praise yet being said for nothing? Does anyone know that I no longer hold on the tears in my heart? No one bah. I do not know whether is I'm in fault for not sharing my problems yet saying that there isn't anyone for me. Or was it really there's none that I can talk to when I'm feeling low? Oh being frank, I hate to say that. M just wondering what's friends and where're they?
Perhaps I've been thinking of too many stuffs when I'm on my journey back home this morning. My tears just rolled down my cheeks, closing my eyes... so many things just flashed back. My mom was the first came across my mind, the same question that I'm thinkin just when can she stop working? When... ? Some how, I just feel like ending my life together with her.
My friends, we used to hang out late night @ PM and just once that you girls listen to me. But where's my advise, I do not know. Each time I just feel so difficult to say a word to you girls, or I do not 've any chance to speak at all? Hais.. M still in two minds whether to go out with you girls later or not s m moodless to do anything other than crying silently in the lonely spacious room. I wishes to cry till I went blind till I couldn't see anything, anyone in this fucking hell world. Just wishing to 've my mom by my side.
I couldn't be strong anymore... I'm tired... totally worn-out. Tempted to drink, tempted to smoke, tempted to 've an off day tonight, should I?
To all my friends, I'm always stupid to hurt you guys/girls. I always show my attitude when I'm unhappy, I always throw my tantrum when I'm pissed off. I always walk off with can't be bother to explain attitude that why I'm being like this. I no longer wishing for my adidas jacket, Da Chang Jin VCD, A-mei CD, CD named "love", New Hair cu, tNew Jean, Tops, Newbie 'shirt, PMK 'sin, Op's short, Op's skirt, Hangbag, MP4New handphone, SEW550i, Personal Mini D.Cam blah blah blah. I'm wishing for a belly piercing, tattoo and someone to give me a stab s m a coward to end my own life.
It was a heartaching morning and he just make it more worse by asking me for 200 bucks for clearing his credit outstanding amount? I cried, was think what's e hell you're asking me for money when you don't even support single of us at home, you don't even pay for my everything. And this is why that makes me think "no matter how much things/works that I've done/do is always insufficient"...
I hope I'd be strong later when m having breakfast with sister.
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:21
22 April 2006
Good news! I got my tongue pierced. Hees. Last minute they called 'em down and Kino got it done for me at the last break time, around 5.30am? It wasn't pain at all, trust me. Or perhaps, she's skillful? And it's done less than a minute? They were previously telling me that if I can endure the pain, fastest is 10minutes? Haha... just one minute lah, =) Gotten so mani piercing, think the one that I really say painful is the 5th hole of the ear? Not even the upper hole is that pain. Happy, but sad thing's I've gotta eat congee... =(
This morning couldn't sleep norhx, maybe is because mummy didn't make me a cup of milo. S I always said, milo helps me to sleep better due to the nutrient, calcium. So I waited till 11am and m still awake. Just then I remembered that there are packets of milo drink in the 'fridge. N around 2pm, m being frightened by mom. I was half awake when she stood beside my bed asking if I'd like to accompany for lunch. And yes I m dreadfully tired, sleepy but still I accompained her s she haven't had anything and just vomitted when she reached home. Yes, my mom's unwell. Hais.. hope she get well soon. M having difficulties even in eating congee with the stud on the tongue... ;( Alright, m out to buy dinner for them. =)
Lil' bern if you happens to visit here, I just wanna let you know that I failed to visit your site. Each time I gets in, it closed my window. I think u're allergies to sth? Hope you're getting better =)
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:37
21 April 2006
M back home from work. Idah was asking me what's the fine for losing the pass, and right after I answered her 10bucks, I realised that I lost my pass too. I get so worried sick that m turning the whole factory up side down. I thought Adrain was playing with me, but he was darn serious telling me that he didn't take. And I suspected May s she was looking at the log book so I thought she kept it. But she given me that innocent look that she really didn't take. While she was mumbling about anyone found any pass, I heard that china girl saying her friend found one, no. 39. I felt totally relief... =) So was Lili found it... thanks girl.
Xue Ni, Mable and Gina checked their results at workplace but I simply didn't 've the guts to know how badly I've done. And yes, m back home to check. I thought, I thought the module gonna flunk me would be accounting, and the module that gonna rescuse me would be taxation. But it's vice versa. BCM s expected... M really glad that I've done well in the first semester, and it really saved me in my cum GPA. M still securing a 3.(sth) not that bad. I could still get a higher GPA if m willing to put in just a lil' more effort. =)
Alright, m tired. Yawn...
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:37
20 April 2006
Recently feel famished easily yet I don't 've a great appetite to eat much just to fill up the empty stomach. That's e effect of work depression... no work also depressed. Since work, haven't been going for evening job, perhaps... I shall starts my evening jog if there's no work tonight. Rotted. N m saying finally I get to see the entire page of blogskins. I suppose, e server has been loading pretty slower nowadays.
Alright, it seems like it's not working again. Nvm. O girl reminds me of e past, n I realised that I haven't been updating that entry since 250206. Alright, shall do it tonight if I'm free. Kino promised to pierce for me latest by Monday night, happy. Is late now, haven't receive her call... think should be another off day bahs, sians, tomorrow results gonna be out best wishes to all. N tomorrow going to get my pay, if not working at night again, maybe going club with girls on sat
I hope I'll luv myself more
12:34
19 April 2006
Why every time, I do not know what I really want? Lately, I really hate to be alone... be it at anywhere... when I'm alone, I think of you. Where are you, what you're doing. I hate myself for holding my tears, yet I hate myself to cry over you.
I couldn't sleep well lately, having you in my mind constantly, memories just flashed back. This evening reminded me of the day you've been over to my place. I still 'd remember that I felt so unbearable to wake you up. The dinner we had, the journey to the bus stop, the stuffs you bought from the mini-mart, those smses you smsed me. So much so of precious moments being with you, what has went wrong?
I miss you...
I hope I'll luv myself more
19:33
Is 3:02am obviously m having a day off. I miss working wif 'min n kino, wondering when 'll e four of us be playing during our break time. Elder brother's gonna be back tomorrow. Is 5:51am second brother just came back home saying that he don't feel like going to work again. N of course I'm damn pissed off. Anyway, he's thinking of giving me a treat to sakae sushi since a few days back. N just now he asked if I'm wanting to go this afternoon together with lil' ved. He's willing to share with me to buy Da Chang Jin, as well as the latest CD album of Zhang Hui Mei.
Is 1.39pm, "ve been online for 12hours? Dots, m wondering what's so good to surf about. Alright, m off to rest, hopefully later will be work for all of us. Sunday meeting girls out, n the trip with friends to batam is off. "ve got to plan for an outing with school girls before holiday ended. So mani things to do... :)
`Updates_
By right should be having dinner with second bro, sis n lil' ved. Second brother is treating us to sakae sushi, but sotong girl called me to ask us [Kino, 'min, 'na n I] to standby for work tonight. I really do hopes she call, please call... m waiting for her call, please! I'm begging... yes begging. I couldn't sleep well, worrying that there might be no work, there might be more off day and there might be shutdown. Worrying so much about work, worrying so much about earning money, getting more and more worried sick. So worried sick for work instead of my result that's gonna be out this Friday. Why? I really need to earn my own pocket money, I no longer wanna rely on my mom, I really piti her... I wanna help her... really wanna help her. I do not wish to see her work so much yet all the money are spent on us.
After so long, I had finally talk to dad's in a better attitude. N I smiled... yes I smiled... he too. He came into my room and said "Quick, go and 've your dinner before it turns cold". I miss this sentenance, oh well... I used to be pissed off when he repeat himself last time. But things are really different now. I wish I'd earn s much money s possible to clear up his credit debts.
Hp bills finally arrived... it's not what I had expected. But is really dirt cheap for this month. Alright... 130bucks for all bills this month. Saturday morning, gonna clear all ups.
If we are all working tonight, m gonna get my tongue pierced. In for a penny, in for a pound.
I hope I'll luv myself more
03:04
18 April 2006
Sometimes, I just love to work with company staffs, they're darn duper nice and the most important thing's... they dote me darn much. 
Unlike young teens, they'll talk back behind you when you're slow, when you did something wrong, jealous of you when you're being praised blah*3. O well, I just dreamt of my workplace shutting down. That's a bad sign s it shows that I desperately needs to work overtime.
Unlike young teens, they'll talk back behind you when you're slow, when you did something wrong, jealous of you when you're being praised blah*3. O well, I just dreamt of my workplace shutting down. That's a bad sign s it shows that I desperately needs to work overtime.Alright I need some advice, should I buy the adidas jacket that cost me 100 over bucks when there isn't much work these few days? Oh well, I think I should spend the 100 bucks on what I needs [one new jean] n one new school shoes... (just nice that its make up of 100 bucks too)Please give some advices. Thanks...
I hope I'll luv myself more
07:03
16 April 2006
`Bloods boiled_
Brother was saying that he's not going to work tomorrow s he's going to BBDC. It was like hell isn't it? So what if he won bets on soccer? I'm not gonna curse him, but I'm gonna say he won't be so lucky all the times. IF he happens to lose money again, I doubt his dad's has got the money to lend him any more. M waiting to watch the good show. Yes, m mean, so what? N see, he rather lend money to his friend's mother than to return it back to mom. I overheard his conversation, and I went what the hell? Don't force me to terminate the internet, idiot!
I hope I'll luv myself more
17:18
Alright, is 5:18am in e morning m still awake. Chatting wif lil' kino, jio her for bbf with xiao min. Not yet confirm, cuz my princess min's sleeping soundly at this hour. Let's see if our smses are power enough to wake her up from her piggy land.
Kino promised me to do e tongue piercing for me @ work place.
So it'll be soon... alright, I don't wanna deny that I'm not scare at all. M lil' scare but should be fine soon. Be it weder it's a fashion or out-dated, m not gonna gif a damn care. S I know e pain that it gonna cause, is uncomparable to the pain that you caused to me in the past. 
What's biting her? Mom was urging me to call her to see if working tonight so I smsed her and she replied off? After a few mins when I was about to walk into the kitchen to tell mom's that m having another day off she called and said she only wants Gina n me. Alright, m 
. But poor Sakiyo and Kino, they're darn sians at home lers. At first, we're planning to chill out tonight... but it seems like... I couldn't join 'em lers. Sorries, miss you girls lots.
. But poor Sakiyo and Kino, they're darn sians at home lers. At first, we're planning to chill out tonight... but it seems like... I couldn't join 'em lers. Sorries, miss you girls lots. Happy Birthday to Gina... smuackiex
Mom's unwell, pain all over here. N m having headache, it's like so sickening... why m I having headache when I've gotta work?
M doing a research on SEW900i, SEW810i,SEW500i and N6280 which phone to eye on?
I hope I'll luv myself more
05:19
15 April 2006
There's this fear to be alone late in the night, s m thinking lots of things. `e feeling of being able to be strong is no longer good at all. I'd rather be a cry baby, cry out everything...
Life's so darn bored nowadays that I couldn't blog much about it. Entries are getting shorter n shorter, I just wonder was it a good sign?
I wasn't sleeping well these few nights. I hope m not regretting anything n m seriously sending my best wishes :) everything 'd be fine soon.
Happiness needs some process.
M trying to edit my template since I woke up, but I didn't edit much of it either. Was it really my luck to 've u s my brother? N m praying he don't says much 'bout me to you. Even he does, please don't utter it to mom.
M frying egg, can u imagine? Yes it burnt a lil', just a lil'. It's still edible and it taste darn duper nice although it looks unappealing. Adding into my dry maggie mee... slurp slurp
I hope I'll luv myself more
05:59
14 April 2006
M back home, sigh. No work for us. N m careless I put one book lesser for 2 times? Hell... and was being caught and yes I did a rescreen, hell. Alright... m tired, gonna sleep.
Thurs nite half day, tomorrow shutdown, that gone my adidas jacket.
Turn in pretty late last night yet m awake @ 6.30am. Thinking of something, n I realised m knowing how to be strong. Just feeling sad but no tears, no drink, no smoke. That's so unusal of me, but is e facts. Finish doing my laundry, nothing to do now, feeling so sians. Wanna go shopping yet not in e mood to. So might s well stays @ home yah?
Alright, m telling myself i'll only get my adidas jacket if my result shows a GPA of 3.5 for this semester.
Sians.
I hope I'll luv myself more
00:18
13 April 2006
Sigh... again... I do not wish to blog about what happened last night at work. I just wanna say, my left thumb's in great pain, swollen and bleeds a lil' inside. All thanks to her, she's slow and selfish. So what if he favours her more? M unhappy, so unhappy that I nearly cried, hais. We were all fast yet he said we're slow... and was repeating himself. Hais.. Friday shutdown... sians... that goes away my 1.5 rate. Tonight we're having curry @ work =) m cooking the rice for 'em. Hehe... praying hard that i won't be in the same line s 'em
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:33
12 April 2006
M switching on the com again after I had a good calculating of the pay that m gonna get on the 21 apr. M earning nearly 1K for 2 weeks. Afterall, it's pretty relaxing job with a reasonable pay? Yes... a good pay for students like us. So m computing further, the next 2 weeks working daily w/o having off, my earning beyond another K. So finally m earning 2k for one holiday [1 month]. Is a lot isn't it? So I've planned that m going back to work during Friday and Saturday, for that, I'd earn 600bucks for one month. Here's a better computation
Monthly Salary => 600 bucks
Bills => 100 bucks [Hopefully]
Transportation => 50 bucks [Is not enough but m using e balance of bills to cover it up]
Allowance => 100bucks [Hopefully girls won't be eating good stuffs daily]
Shopping allowance => 50 bucks
**Rewards => 50 bucks
Saving = 300-350
**Rewarding myself if I do well with my class assessment so it's not a monthly rewards... =)
M gonna give it a try. I hope on the other hand, I won't neglect my studies. Afterall, the coming up semester modules would only be advance accounting, business taxation, costing... all these modules requires computation, no theory involved... so I see no difficulties in working just Friday and Satuday. I swear I'll be a good girl to mug daily and sunday I'd just do some catch up. =D M gonna be proud of myself if m attaining a good gpa for the coming semester.
Oh m worrying for my result that gonna be released on 21 apr. Here I've got to say, i hate him so much [e security guard] s he always caught me putting my legs up on another chair, against me each time the sensor sounded and the worse was that... he caught my friend punching punch card for me. I thought it's gonna be a big issue, but all he did was recording of names =) M totally stunned, it was so unbelievable. N he even told me where my pass has dropped and yes, he fixed it for me. M blushing and feeling the kindness in him. N afterall, he's just doing his job as a sercurity guard. Oh well, m gonna be nice to him.
M gonna dream of earning lots of money later. Haha... alright... m gonna sleep. Nighty.
I hope I'll luv myself more
08:36
M back home early this morning s I was being paid for slacking work last night. Yes, m saying Is the hardest money to earn.
It seems like I really needs a day off? Bestie 'nes is starting school on the 17 Apr, m wanting to meet her up during her holiday so that we'd be shopping for one who day. N late in e night, I could just chill out with babes @ PM. But m broke, seriously broke. ='( Why m I? 'Cuz I said m an idiot s I almost spent 3-4 bucks per night on milo can when I actually brought my water bottle there for e sake of not spending a single cent. But hais. Perhaps... from tonight onwards, I shall not bring any money there. =) Seriously I left with 10bucks. How m I gonna survive till 21 Apr? N the pay's meant for this month internet bill + 2months of handphone bills... not too much... just need 'bout 150bucks [hopefully] to clear up all debts. So the balance, I should keep it n I mean it! The next pay i'll get my adidas jacket @ heeren. That's all... so m praying that my phone 'll just be functioning well till my birthday, 7months more... possible? Wonder
*I wanna a newbie sin'
*I wanna a PMK 'shirt
*I wanna 2 tops
*I wanna 1 Jean
*I wanna 1 short pant
*I wanna skirts
*I wanna 1 pair of new shoe
*I wanna 2 tops
*I wanna 1 Jean
*I wanna 1 short pant
*I wanna skirts
*I wanna 1 pair of new shoe
**I wanna buy my adidas jacket
**I wanna clear my bills
I wanna do manicure
**I wanna clear my bills
I wanna do manicure
I wanna a tongue piercing [Kino can get it done for me, is free]
I wanna a belly piercing
I wanna a tattoo
*I wanna buy Da Chang Jin Vcd
I wanna a belly piercing
I wanna a tattoo
*I wanna buy Da Chang Jin Vcd
*I wishing that someone will buy for me
** Die die also 've to buy it/do it
I miss sitting down on com chair @ 10pm to watch Da Chang Jin
I miss my evening jog
I miss my sit ups
I miss going to gym
I miss hanging out with babes @ PM
M tempted to smoke
BUT [... m resisting whn they smoked kies?]
BUT [... m resisting whn they smoked kies?]
I hope I'll luv myself more
07:11
11 April 2006
I wanna a tongue piercing
I wanna a belly piercing
I wanna a tattoo
I wanna buy Da Chang Jin Vcd
Some how I just dislike myself so much. I hate my friends to give in to me all the time. I was really a princess like this morning, oh dear I really can't imagine that. We were all dead beat yet the sickening girl (me) was dying for an apple pie for dayS. So I asked if they would like to join me for breakfast and yes, we waited for 'bout half an hour but the apple pie is still not yet prepared? My waiting time is up, m not gonna eat and I asked em to leave. Perhaps... to most of you, is nothing a big deal, but I simple hate being like this. S they were really extremely worn-out. Thanks girls, m lurfing all of you
M wanting to let you know things wouldn't possible be going smoothly for everyone. I believe in hard work paid off so all the best to you. Be it whether did I really said anything wrong or that hurts you so much, m sorries. Did you given me another chance to help? Nope... you refused to call.
I hope I'll luv myself more
10:02
10 April 2006
Alright... for the entry in black font. M gonna explain.
Be it everything, I'm always gullible to trust ones. They said they're in needs of money I helped by seeking job for them. N they said "m coming down right now" but they would be changing their mind s quick s less than a sec that they aren't coming down any more. M stupid just stupid. M a loser in everything, be it in e family, be it in results, be it in everything, m always a loser s no one saw e potential in me bt others. M a failure s i m always failed to cheer one ups. Bt m making e situation more worse just like now.
M i wrong to say that... a MORE diligent student deserve e place in poly s compared to those who're hardworking? A student who puts in 101% of his/her effort SHOULD deserve a better place in poly s compared to those who putted in just 100% of his/her effort, m I wrong to say that? How would a poly possible be rejecting a student with a grade A and took in a student in their campus who has got a grade B? M I saying anything wrong? If I'm, please correct me.
M stating all the facts. And yes... your dream, your wish is possible to achieve it. Perhaps... it just took another year to fulfil. That's it. Is easy... hope you'd just cheer up soon and stop being so depressed.
To all my beloved juniors taking O level please kindly work harder NOW before you end up in such a situation like them.
N yah... a diligent student don't starts deciding to put in efforts when Os in a year ahead, but they USED to be putting all their efforts in every test/ca/mock paper n exam be it countable or non-countable paper.
No regrets... to myself n some. Don't ever says that this world is unfair... s you're e one who achieving everything yourself..
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:51
Alright, m asking... was my brother realli that
famous
solid
scary?
They're leaving me a distance, but why?
I hate to say this but I've to say it. These few days i lost the trust in friends. For the past few days I had realli forgotten what happened. But this morning, she lost my shirt. Oh well, must I inform or rather remind her to take my shirt out from the locker when she should know that, that shirt belongs to mine as it's brand new shirt? Must I really tell her everything what to do and what she shouldn't do? O well, we're all same age, m having no right to order her to do things for me. But at the same time, I do not wish to see her being bullied and stressing herself up.
I wanna buy my adidas jacket!
I wanna clear my bills
I wanna trim my nails
I miss doing sit ups
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:22
09 April 2006
I wanna a newbie singlet
I wanna a PMK T-shirt
I wanna 2 tops
I wanna 1 Jean
I wanna 1 short pant
I wanna skirts
I wanna 1 pair of new shoe
I miss exercising
I miss my evening jog
I miss going to gym
I miss going shopping
I miss catching mid-night movie
I miss chilling out @ PM
Alright, m gonna 've my dinner =) Dad's cooking again!
I hope I'll luv myself more
17:52
08 April 2006
First n foremost, Happy belated birthday to my beloved mummy. M sorries that i couldn't celebrate your birthday with you last evening.
Have been doing the labelling n my fingers are in great pain now. Should be fine after a few days. Hais. Alright, no matter how tough it's... I still 've to bear with it till 15 Apr, at least I'd earn some money for my own school fees and bills. Hang on there =)
Haven't been visiting the dental since my last secondary school days. And finally I feel the pain when m brushing my teeth just now. Or was it because I've been chewing ice cubes lately? Whatever... shall be visiting the dental soon.
M wishing to pay my aunt a visit at JB... not sure when, perhaps on the next day off of mom's. We shall head in there together. Ooo... shall get my sweetie cousins something. Alright, m missing them.
They're always like this, m damn disappointed
I hope I'll luv myself more
10:00
Mable's a bao tou kia, ham ji kia, kpo kia, sia lan kia, complaint kia, si lan kia, ji bai kia, bo yong kia, chee hong kia and mani more, is not worth my time typing it out.
Alright... is was a misforture to work with her again. She always think that she knows everything and she's capable in doing everything yet when things start to jam on her side, she'd just say that her knee cap is pain, back aching etc... it was all because you have got too much of body fats and that's why your legs couldn't hold on to your body weights. And because you're old, you couldn't work fast and that's why it jammed. Such a simple logic you also don't know? Still dare to say that you're clever? I feel like puking! Alright... you're such a flirt, did you know that? I doubt you know s you're thinking that you're too pretty, sucks! I think all girls over there including all the malays aunties and indian aunties are much more prettier than you, so please stop flirting uncles! Hell... wanna say people say infront of them and not complaint to her, s it has obvious reflected you're such a coward! And before you say others, please think twice... and you're an idiot to say people yet you're doing the same things s them. KNN, I've never ever come across such person like you. Please stop thinking that all your friends liked you, cuz they're e same as me, they dislike you more than like, understand idiot?!!
Count yourself lucky m not in clementi ite.
I hope I'll luv myself more
08:37
07 April 2006
By right m going down for registration but I didn't cuz after thoughts, e pay's still about e same. But the destination makes a big difference. Alright... m still going back there to work.
I hope I'll luv myself more
07:02
06 April 2006
M mad! I couldn't find the top that I wanted to wear for e interview later. And yes, I insist in wearing that for today. Madness... just wear I have left it at? Praying hard that it will come out itself after this hide and seek game.
My eyes what's wrong, is hurting me. 2 red eyes how to go for interview lah, idiot! M in bad luck today.
Alright... mom has a day off, sis too and so i m gonna take a day off too. Hmm, m calling a advance celebration for mom's birthday tonight...
M tired... hais...
M asked to consider to be e clerk, is nice actually. But pressurized as in u'll 've to meet the boss and directors etc. It isn't a small company but a big company. Alright... so in the end, I choose to be the QA still. M stupid. Yes...
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:50
05 April 2006
=D
Alright a quick update before I went off to work. My mummi workplace e first gan er zi cooked some delicious dishes for us, especially me. Haha, he darn dotes on me, don't jealous. Even sis also jealous... oh =)
Yes, finally I gotten the motorola agent to speak to me. So tomorrow m going down for an interview. And he was asking how old m I through the phone and asking if I wanted to be QA. Oh... seriously... I don't want please... unless higher pay :)
So mom haven't been cooking for weeks and finally today she cooked something for us. Finally realise that the nicer food in this world is my mom's cooking. M running late, tata.
I hope I'll luv myself more
18:24
04 April 2006
`I realised_
Thanks for letting me know that I'm gullible, I'm stupid. Thanks for letting me know that I'm a failure, I'm a loser.
Learning to let go.
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:16
03 April 2006
Alright... m saying is April month, 4years... we nearly lost contact with one another. M glad... that I found you back at least we're still friend.
M working right now, working back Ryder's temporarily. M gonna contact her asap... m wanting a more human-like job. So that I can work in the morning, tv in the evening... perhaps.. club @ night.
It changed lots... 30mins break instead of 15mins break. Why they're so nice to us, b'cuz we hitted the target lah, duh...
I hope I'll luv myself more
09:13
02 April 2006
Guy like him [Beno] [ownself looks like ah beng] always fond of calling me ah lian. M innocent, m not lookin like one either. Erm erm... alright, just back from PM for my dinner or rather my supper, whatever hell it's... w gurls. I saw this advertisement saying: "No one can survive on a diet of hope" aha... reminded me of e other advertisement we saw on 7 Jan at e same place. What's e hell m I missin you? M asking him and he said maybe? It depends? He reminded me not to regret. Yes he was emphasizing that time flies... indeed... is April now. Oh yah, result would be out on 21 Apr, Friday @ 9am...
I hope I'll luv myself more
03:04
01 April 2006
`I felt so rotted shit at home_
Just wake up from nap, I simply hates this kind of lifestyle... sleep,eat,tv,sleep,eat,tv,sleep. M becomin a PIG and I mean it, a PIG.
Alright, by right m planning to 've a good rest during weekend and start work only on Monday, but it seems like m feeling so rotted shit at home already. Oh no, this kind of feeling is bad enough to spoil my mood. Moody* Nothing to do at home... especially weekend, there isn't any show that is nice to watch either. Sians...
Thinking of working day shift job, isn't that better? Don't really mind night shift, as long as the pay is reasonable to work. Hais. Thinkin of getting some office work during this holiday, but doubt they'll want, is just a month holiday, is no longer half a year.
M wondering 'll he call us to work later? As late as 11pm? Oh well, he's fond in doing that...
I hope I'll luv myself more
13:49
